Day 24: This post is written for the novella, 'An Orkut Love Story' as part of the prompt Ultimate Blog Challenge for July 2014.
CHAPTER 24:
We watched Jaane Tu Ya
Jaane Na in the morning at Eros, Churchgate, holding hands, cuddling and
stealing passionate kisses, hiding behind the veil of darkness, a privilege
enjoyed in the theater.
We couldn’t leave each
other’s hands and eyes. She leaned her head on my shoulder, as I run my fingers
down on her hair and cheek, stroking her lips with my finger. Swagata smiles
coyly and blushing, turning her face away, at times scolding me, ‘Let’s watch the
film peacefully, na.’
Today, I saw a new
Swagata, a sensitive girl who giggle at silly jokes cum japes and wiped her
tears with the pink handkerchief and tissue papers. I smile, wondering, “She is
so sensitive, something she keeps guarded to herself like a secret and pretends
to be someone who can never be hurt by anything. I gotta win her heart and sweep
her off the feet.” Often, she would pull my hair and I would stare openly at
her, to see her tears. “I can’t help falling in love with her and even while in
tears, she is beautiful like a beautiful angel. I don’t want this 'carpe diem' moment to die.”
In the evening, we
spent the night together at Tushar and Tania’s flat, as they left for Goa in
the morning. I am sitting on the bed, toggling with the house key, eagerly
waiting for Swagata to get out of the shower. I can hear a cute voice singing,
‘Tip tip Barsa Pani’ as gentle drop of water falls.
She seductively walks
inside the room, her luscious body wrapped in a white towel. Her eyes, red with
passion, eyes me and biting her lips.
She smirks at me,
“What are you looking at?”
“I am not admiring
your hot body but a song is playing in my mind, Paani mein Nahake aur bhi
Namkeen hogayi hai (You have become more savoury/sensual after getting inside
the water).”
She blushes, “Oho!”
Swagata drops the
towel and inches towards me, the collar of my shirt, running her finger on my
face. I start kissing her, caressing her flawless body, running my hand on the
upper part of her body. We made love that night. It is the most beautiful night
which saw two become one. She finally said, “I love you.” I held her in my
arms, “I love you, too.”
We are drunk on Vodka,
her Apple flavored Smirnoff, perfect for the shared intimacy. She gleans, “Do
you mind if I ask you something about your ex? Was she as good as me?”
This question struck
me like a volcano and it was not the occasion to spoil our intimate moment. “Baby,
you are the best. No, she cannot be as good as you. I hate thinking about her,
her vision flashes back to the mind irritation and spurt of anger.”
She is adamant, “See,
she is no longer with you and why get irritated over an in-existent relation. I
want to know you better and you can ask me anything, about my ex-boyfriends and
flings.”
I eye her, “Are you
sure you won’t get jealous? Be ready to roll on the floor with laughter.”
She asks, “Do I look
insecure?”
I hold her by the
waist as we sit on the bed, ready to narrate her to my story with Koyal who
made me lose my mental sanity.
3 comments:
Ranveer, I'm visiting from the UBC. Wow, it looks like I've dropped in on Chapter 24 of your romantic novel! Even just reading this chapter, it's really interesting. I'm already curious to know more about the characters. Are you just having fun with it, or do you want to build it into a best-seller? I'm an author, so may I make two suggestions? First, watch your tenses and keep them consistent. Second, ask someone who grew up speaking American English to read your manuscript through to be sure it sounds natural. All the best with your book!
I too am reading from UBC and have dropped into your romantic story at an intimate time. It moved my emotions even though I don't know the characters. I'm agreeing with Kebba about the English grammar and conversation. I think having someone who speaks English is a good idea.
@Catty: Thanks loads for the inputs and will move from there:)
Cheerz
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