2017-06-22

It's not called friendzoned but men-women friendship


It's not a tale of estrogen meeting testosterone and the X-factor of sexual attraction that hinges on everything imaginable. Yes! Not everything needs an electric shock running dizzy in our body to burst alive our sex bubble. Men and women can be friends and need not be in a platonic-cum-fancy one-night stand relationship. Pure friendship exists.

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Image credit: Google


It was in the college days when a flatmate that I abhorred told me how men and women can never be friends. I shrugged it off! Stupidity has an invisible human form. There was a time when I was chaperoned by the hottest and most attractive women during my student days where some turned out to be the best buddies that I ever have. Nah! I didn't feel the need to offer my friendship as a shield to hit on them. There were no sour grains. We turned out to be the best of friends.

These women became my confidants and incarnated the 'guys talk' where I discussed anything with them right from the crushes, the woman I was madly in love with and swearing in front of them. Being in their company was pure bliss where we shared everything under the sun. There was no hesitation or constraint that I am speaking to a female and never became conscious to delete words or adjectives. We shared a certain bond. I would call them my 'male buddies.' Yeah! Right! They do the guys talk much better than the males I hanged around with whenever I freaked out about the love (s) of my life. Mind you! These super hot and perfectly beautiful women turned out to be the best companions. I never hit on them for there was a conviction about this riske job where friendship would go for a toss.

We are such a complex and confused society when it comes to the man-woman relationship. It's high time to move beyond this cliche that only one relationship exists between them. Men and women can exist without the sibling relationship and still share a sacred relationship based on deep bonding, respect and minus the attraction or sexual angle. For people who claim that both sexes can never make it as amazing 2 a..m friends probably never had someone of the opposite sex as a chum.

Friendship is sacred and bears no time limit, nor it's seasonal. It's genderless. There is one thing that I have always treasured and been emotional about and its friendship which matters more than anything else. Why paint the relationship between men and women? The moment we do it, the friendship is tainted and ruined forever. It's one of the most beautiful aspects of this timeless relationship. I would always hit off with a female buddy, smoking, watching a movie, go high on a joint and for that matter, catching up with beer. A flurry of shit is exchanged as the conversation veer about everything in life and coming with ingenious solutions that would put Einstein to shame. Poor guy! Must be reeling inside his grave and whining, 'Why the fuck I never came up with this one?'

The boy-girl-man-woman friendship is what vibes are all about. It's not even the friend zoned that naysayers would say and scorn at this relationship which never shies in blossoming in any season of the year. There is a thin line between friend zone and true friendship where the former doesn't even come into play since there is no attraction. OK! Be honest. There might be a certain degree of attraction but it's just a plain and passing feeling. It's a relationship based on trust where we respect each other's space and privacy as humans who bat for each other and standing tall during the rough weather. This friendship hold meaning for nothing can change even after decades.

Yes! A man and woman can be great friends and share a deep cum rooted cum meaningful relationship. It's not about whatsapp group but true dosti that stand the test of times. You don't make friends looking for sexual or material benefits. I think there is a dividing line between attraction or love on one hand and friendship on the other when we speak between the man-woman equation. The rest doesn't matter whether it's society's twisted mind or the faulty eyesight.

Love
Vishal




2017-06-19

Longing and lost on dark boulevard

A seemingly lost road,
unfamiliar boulevard and lanes.
Fazed and disjointed,
I long for a home,
something to call my own.
Craving for new friends,
 a woman to share my life
Momentary love
Isn't it traded on the market of hearts?
A courtesan for company,
nursing tears and healing wounds,
listening to deep dark secrets and whining.
After all, I am paying for company,
in exchange for an ear to listen and tender shoulder,
unbound caress,
adventure frill.
Making love behind the dark walls at night,
admiring tall buildings,
a silent and stranger lover,
we crave for company,
Closed mouth dipped into each other,
healing pain and distress 
rubbing salt on wound of separation 
It isn't just love that ordinary mortals seek,
but exploration of the mind and body,
to quench the thirst.
Encounters in an intriguing city
It may not last an hour
but who cares?
as long as it cuts corner and close gaps.


Love
V

2017-06-02

Lush and mush words in June

Flaky lip,
the taste of liquor and brandy,
swirling on the tongue's edge like a hot, passionate kiss
gulping to perfection,
sending rush of warmth roiling inside the stomach
the drizzling new season
winter has arrived
freezing sensation,
watching the sunshine trot gently
fresh brewed coffee
in the comfort of the coffee shop,
observing the surrounding and occupants swerving.
concocting a story
pure addiction
beautiful women
lone grandpa walking slowly but enjoying life in all it forms
 leaves snuggle on trees,
gyrating to music
crowd lost in translation 
longing for caress and a swing 
It's June
lush and mush words
kissing to make poetry
Cheerz to a new season.

Love
V

2017-05-29

Unsung song and shimmering gold

Shimmering gold
As dark as illusion
Existence is just a pack of lies
Rough and unpolished from the surface
Scratch, scars, and bruise
Flutter of wind,
stroking the senses
Experiencing the intense and emotional form 
Unpolished yellow
Turning into the goldsmith,
to design existence and carving the reflection of stars
As myriad as it gets!
the unsung song
Aren't we all made of clay?
Muddy terrain that we tread,
Wounds injected
Sprinkle lil bit of salt on our rough interiors,
to shine into a flawless spot
We need some polishing to remove the scratch
Our brain wiring emotions
Separating chaff from the wheat
It's our golden moment
Filter 
Laugh
Smile.


Love
V

2017-05-27

Why I have been single for so long?


I don't remember the last time I dated somebody and lost the art of flirting or striking a conversation with a random stranger girl. It's all about net practice, like some of my male friends would tell and urge me to be the wild stallion that I may have been in the past, at a time when people around me are either getting married, being in and out of a slew of casual relationships or flings.

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Image credit: Google.


The school days were spent studying and facing the pressure with the same good ole mantra, 'No good marks, no good job and no decent girl with marry you. You can find a girl once you are done with certificates.' Surviving on a measly pocket money for a middle class boy means the chances of taking a girl out is slim. It left me with only one choice, bank robbery. I turned into a speccy nerd whom girls found boring to date. They'd better choose death which means no action for me, sadly. I whined my time fooling around with my 'luccha' friends and time just flew.

There were too many options of beautiful girls to crush on in college and too many choices means a life time went on to decide whom to date or not. There were too many silly crushes that I contented myself my share and the eyes kept craving for the strawberry faces. College life flickered like dust.

See, I am a one man woman and the girl I liked was either taken and poor me was friend-zoned. I waited in vain for her to break with her boyfriend and when the time came, I already moved on to greener pastures. Same old story repeated here.

When it was the time to date with money in hand, work took its own toll on me and there was hardly any time for that. The days were spent waking up early, getting ready for work and sleeping. I forgot what it was like to go around with someone.

I was still figuring out what I wanted to do with life, career wise. Most of the chicks at work were either taken, made a sister and very few had brains whom you can date. You know, mindless conversations and gossips. The worse thing is my silly brain that raised the relationship standard too high post my last relationship where me and my girl had an intellectual level where our minds more than the heart converged. There was no way that I could lower my dating standards. I am no Deepika who chucked the suave Ranbir for Ranveeer. To complicate things, it's my ethical mind that was at play where office romance is a strictly no-no affair. A decade went by without finding that almost perfect someone and my heart goes on. I felt like the male version of Celine Dion from another era.

Losing faith in human relationships with the amount of break ups and marriages going kaput became part of my routine. To top it all, I became so used to be along and single. Bad habits are hard to break. I became cynical with relationships after my break up where my everything was invested in that single relationship. The time I spent to nurse my wound and heal...Time to move on, baby!

With time, I can only admire a beautiful girl from a looming distance and thinking that she is too young for me or too hot to handle. Better, I go back to college days where occasional dating was drenched in memory. It feels like the train has already left the station and there is no one to blame, except yourself for failing to hop on the bandwagon. You are no longer handsome and she is a fucking princess. Smile and move on.

During the college days, a question haunted me: Why aren't I dating? It's simple. I was in a relationship with the gang who was only interested in making merry, fooling around and busy having fun by smoking, boozing and occasional ganja parties. Friends became my life and everything. There was no place for a chick to enter my life or else vows of friendship would've been violated.

The pressure to get married and all that shit where you tend to hit back at parents who keep bringing a prospective match. As it is, matrimonial sites like shaadi.com are for silly people who can't even find someone on their own. Certainly, I don't want to be that guy who goes on a blind date set by parents where the woman finds me bizarely weird.

Books, blogging and the unsuccessful attempt to write this best selling book about imaginary love and sex became my priority. I wanted to become the next Chetan Bhagat in town raking the moolah. A decade flew and still nothing ever happened. Probably, things will not be happening in the next decade of my otherwise routine and mechanical life. Sex is a luxury.

Where all those women that you keep urging me to date? I must find them in the first place. They are nowhere to be found and all my prospective dates or flings are already in marital bliss or busy tying the knot. It makes you go mad.

I've spent a major part of my life paying that personal loan that I took to travel, laptop and expensive phone on EMI. There is no money to take a chick out and the little sanity I have makes it impossible to ask a random woman out online. How despo it sounds?!

At the end of the day, it's all about the aspirations to move away from home and parents exploring life in various cities of the world and the joy of staying alone in an apartment gives me a mental masturbation. I prefer to grow and see life rather than being stuck in the drudgery of marriage and kids.

There is no intention to share my bed with someone for the rest of life. Like my whisky, I like my bed large where I can spread my stiff body and spend my time reading fantasies or the world romance in books that sell like hot pancakes. No one shall invade that space. I am scared of invaders and terrorists...who knows some hot bimbo may be hired to plant a bomb. Dreamer I am! It leaves me with only one option...getting laid.

So, now you get the drift? Stop asking me such fucked up questions about how I should have found a chick in college to tie the knot or someone to make my life.

Love ya all, fuckers
V


2017-05-21

'Cougar' and pulling the strings in mature relationships


It's not a new phenomenon. Not is it about sexual thrills or estrogen-you know that sensation that run like electricity in our body and causing our sexual energy to reach an adrenaline high. It doesn't make men and women, predators, hunters and the hunted, witch or cougar, that attracts younger men. Unfortunately, the various media parlance terminology has cast an ugly shadow on relationships which is most of the time blurred by famous social prejudices and dogmas. The great hypocrisy in society that pulls all strings to control relationships that doesn't fall into their personalized grace. You name it, you get it, shame and guilt with the typical log kya kahenge.

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Image credit: Google


The French President Emmanuel Macron is married to his teacher, Brigitte who is 24 years his senior where both have shown that age gap is no excuse for the blooming of a beautifully mature relationship. Would Brigitte be termed a cougar in our present society? I have no doubt on our hypocrisy and uncalled ability of controlling each and every thing or doling of gyaan on how such relationships pollute morality and other fuck ups, born out of the brain child of so-called social norms. There is nothing wrong in marrying someone older than you between younger man and elder women and vice versa. There has been several instances in the past where I have been attracted to women who are much older or younger to me and trust me, there ought not be guilt feelings to that. It whittles down to the personal choice that we make as human beings.

Sadly, we live in a hostile environment where the by-products of society think that it's a legitimate right for them to make our life decisions. It's a blurred path that they love to tread in controlling minds. It's my firm belief that such relationships are based on sexual freedom, empowerment and modernity coupled with maturity in sharing a bond. It's a deep relationship that petty minds cannot understand or weigh in the connection.

The worse about the equation between an elder woman and a young man, on one hand and elder man and younger girl on the other hand, is that very few will blame the man in that. It's a matter of grave prejudice when the woman is always on the receiving end with accusations such as ensnaring the man. Agree, that the term sugar daddy is as prejudicial as cougar but it's during very rare instances that men in such relationships face brickbats.

Moreover, I refuse to see such relationships as a matter of sexual thrills or adventure, and be it for a short-term or long-term relationship, we need to be more open. It is pretty much like inter-caste, inter-race and same-sex love or relationships, where nonsense are blurted out in the name of religion or misplaced morality. It's the plain ego and fear of the patriarch that their so-called established norms are being challenged.

It's a beautiful and admirable to witness the act of love and respect among elder and younger successful couples based on trust. The maturity is inherent, be it sexual, spiritual or on the worldly views where both partners can learn from each other and grow together. I am in awe of people, blessed with the zest for life and energy to feel forever young and daring to shrug off ridiculous comments, social pressures or prejudices. There is a certain dynamism in the so-called 'cougar' relationships.

Of course, every relationship have its own con and is not restricted to the younger man-older woman or older man-young woman or girl. Critics who snub at such relationships often point out that the disinterest in sex at some point will happen, hostility among family or even friends but also an interest of the younger part in someone their age coupled with the lack of spark. 

Hey! A beautiful relationship based on this equation is about maturity. Therefore, the above factors are hurdles that exist in any other relationship. For instance, what is the guarantee that your partner who is exactly your age will not stray or be attracted to someone else? Can a more or else, same age couple stake a claim to sexual compatibility or maturity? I don't think we can give guarantees in today's times. As far as the hostilities are concerned, I strongly believe that it's your life and you are mature enough not to be in the control or mercy of others, be it parents, extended family or anyone else.

No civilized or educated society can thrive on stupid biases and prevent people to live the way they want in their personal relationships. It's high time for words like cougar or sugar daddy be deleted from our dictionary for it fetters our growth and outlook.

Love
Vishal

2017-05-20

Carcass of flesh and eerie night


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https://www.pinterest.com/henkhessel/night-frame/

Vagabond straying alone in the universe's created pathway and dark, empty roads;
 Temptation to sin in the city of lust;
Dark alleys;
Vociferous barking of dogs,
often a despairing call,
distrust of strangers:
Eerie silence in the night:
A temptation too hard to resist:
Of flesh and empty, barren souls;
Craving for tenderness, lusty touch and flowery garden of caress;
Empty souls that we are;
Sensual carcass of flesh,
the illusion of love;
It's plain good fuck that gratifies us;
Mechanical sex;
Sometimes with plain strangers and most of the times under society's stamp of approval;
The traveler in us is desperate;
This journey is an illusion;
Life's portrait can be damaging;
A stark reminder to take things slow;
Knocked down is good;
Stop and breath heavily;
Let the gentle air flow inside;
Close the eyes;
Be dead to the world.

Love
Vishal