Narendra Damodhardas Modi is thy name! The new poster boy of Bharatiya Janata Party is beaming with joy as the Namo-isms swear that his new innings as the Prime Minister in waiting of India is the new Shuddh Desi Romance...oops! flavor of the season!
In the name of the election, Namo-isms is all over the place as he sits in the office toying with the different adjectives, Burqa of secularism, Puppy love and what not?! Wait! Namo-isms! Clamoring for Modi and the top coveted post of PM may well have broken quite a few Mighty Hearts, L K Advani-ji and Sushma Swaraj. Ultimately, Advani-ji and Sushma Swaraj-ji can take a chill pill in the name of Shuddh Desi Romance as they were cajoled nicely by uncle, Rajnath Singh nicely that our Shuddh, 'Narendra' version of Desi Romance with Indian politics doesn't lack the spark of unfulfilled desires like mango people. After all, he is a mango-la made in Gujarat, vibrant economy and God knows what! Advani-ji and Sushma-ji nursing their respective heart breaks suddenly realized that there is no point doing Satyagraha, famous for minting less than Rs 70 crores at the box-office. See! Money speaks and our Narendra Damordhardas is like the non-stop chatter box and speaking tree. Forget all differences and ego as they traipse their way to do Grand Masti, all the way to Delhi.
Just imagine BJP president Rajnath uncle telling Advani-ji: Waise bhi, 'Zyaada mat socho, bas settle ho jao (Don't think too much, just settle down)...PM or not..coz shaadi..oops PM na bani, ya glucose ho gaya, har chees ka ilaaj( Marriage or politics is like ICU or glucose that treat every ailment ICU). Apne dekha Shudd desi mein kya hota, Advani-ji! (Have you seen what happened in Shuddh Desi Romance!). Waise bhi (As it is) it's not your age to do such things, Advani-ji. One more thing Advani-ji, Saara hindustan settlement karane pe laga hai..saath saal se do padosi se settlement kara nahin paee bade chaudhary bante haain( The whole nation is behind getting settled, they couldn't settle two neighbours in 60 years, but still think of themselves as something great). So you see, Advani-ji, how long can we wait for your Satyagraha?! We watched Prakash Jha's Satyagraha on screen once. It's enough and 2009 elections, you told us once more but yeh dil mange more (the heart asks for more). Modi-ji nahin chahiye hum logon ko, but kurshi (We don't want Modi but the chair). See, no offense, O' revered patriarch of the Sangh Parivar! It's not about you or our dear Sushma-ji but we need Kursi, uske baad Grand Masti.
If that was not enough with Sushma Swaraj and Advani-ji making a U-turn to vie for Modi's, the PM-in waiting's attention, struggling their way to the heart of Damodhardas! Woe betide them! Wait! There is more to the romance, Shuddh Desi Romance, 2.0. The likes of defense lawyers like M L Sharma and A P Singh, famous for their antics in the Delhi gang rape and the latest pogo channel ambassador, man in black and former BJP man, Ram Jethmalani will be happy dancing their way if I tell a woman has come to ensnare Modi like Menka. Well! Modi-ji is no Vishwamitra! Or is he? Dunno, whether Jagganath Rath Yatra can compensate to aspire to become Vishwamitra in the times of political polarization..well! Amish Tripathi and Secret of Nagas will know better. After all, controversy is thy name and the one who claimed that she is the first one wearing the bikini, smooching opens her arms to hug Modi-ji. Imagine, our own desi ‘item girl’, Malika Sherawat offering jalebi to Narendra Damodardas on his budday. Our Malika takes the pie and burns the heart of Advani, Sushma Swaraj and Rajnath Singh. Oops! Miss Malika got her moment for Modi's budday and Namo-isms must be seeing red..jealousy kills, I tell you!.Oops! Howzz about seeing Narendra Damodhar Modi and Miss Malika singing and gyrating to the tunes of Bheegi Hont Tere or Tera Salafa? Welcome producer Firoz Nadiadwala will beam if Modi is signed with our Miss M to replace Feroz Khan in Welcome 2! What a package, CM/PM in waiting replaces the late Feroz Khan and acts with Malika Sherawat where the latter and Modi can dance and sing happy birthday before 2014 elections. Just imagine 63-year-old Modi dancing with Malika M behind the trees, not without uttering, 'You don't need Cannes, Baby, to create publicity stunt. You have me! I am the most eligible bachelor, baby. One, Two, Three cha cha cha!
Have you heard that Balaji TV czar, Ekta Kapoor is planning a soap opera based on Rajneeti and Modi-ism? If she gets the idea, make sure you tell her that I am the creative brain behind so that she can selflessly drop some lakhs in my dead bank account. Now, Modi-ji don't you worry about analogies. Your latest admirer, Miss M, will suggest some niceties to vomit on our TV channels singing, 'Yeh Dil Mange More.' Happy wala budday, Sir-jee! Khem Cho!
Khushi Banto Modi-ji (Spread happiness)
With Love and Respect
Namaste and Happy Wala budday, Sir-ji
Please accept my Pranam
Vishal
3 comments:
That's a smart post, but sorry i have no interest in politics whatsoever and I always get such negative vibes from Modiji, I really can't see what positive will come if at all he becomes the PM. I only see 'massacre'.
Thanks!
Thanks, Kajal. The whole idea was to make a funky sorta hatke post after his elevation. It's an idea I've been toying with and finally, wrote it:) I fully agree with you on Damodardas Modi and I too get negative vibes. I am dead against him and how can a butcher of human lives become PM. Spot on, Kajal:)
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