2012-03-01

Can women and men be friends?

Men and women can be friends. It's a statement I'm making and not just a plain statement matter-of-factly. I strongly believe that men and women can be friends and I know that my male counterparts will vehemently oppose this view. Very few men would agree with me and perhaps some women may not express pleasure at this fact of life.
I knew some guys and acquaintances who will say that men and women can only mate, date and have sex. Well, then where you put your respective Rakhi brothers and sisters? Quizz them on the latter fact, they have no answer and will make a joke out of it. The truth is that those people never had a proper exposure to women and they never had good female friends. Honestly speaking, they have been brought up with a limited mindset where they can't look beyond the border of their conservative mindsets. No wonder we guys are referred to MCP. No seriously?! Don't you think so guys.
I have been blessed to have soo many wonderful, beautiful and intelligent female friends who played an important part in my beautiful life. They have been a fellow traveler in quest for self-growth and as the trained stopped, they got down and new ones hopped on. Some of them are not in touch but many of them are. They are wonderful human beings. I strongly believe that there is 'Lakshman-Rekha' that need to be drawn and that some lines should not be crossed. Once, the lines are crossed, the friendship goes 'kaput'. The worst tragedy happens when a beautiful relationship..read strong bond of friendship between a boy and a gal is destroyed.
Of course, there are some exceptions to the rule. At some point, there is bound to be attraction if you spend lotsa times with a friend, be it going together for movies,smsing each other. If there is a mutual consent and belief that you can carry the relationship further and that the friendship will remain intact, go ahead. But, there is a high probability that the equation will not be unaltered since you will look at each other less as friends but more as lovers. Where do you go from here? Before popping the question, make sure that he or she will ignore you and it might as well happen, that the two best friends will stop communicating with each other. A case of a friendship gone sour. I have been lucky when a proposed a friend, she understood my feeling for her. The proposition was rejected outright, But, the bond of friendship grew stronger with time.
Great friendship are those that withstood the test of times. With the flick of time, both of you will move in different directions in life and certain priorities will gain mileage and it is bound that the friendship will not remain intact. But, as you look back, you will be proud that your relationship proved the world wrong and man and women can indeed be friends. Perhaps, as you meet one day over a cup of coffee, you will have a good laugh as you choose to rebel against the ways of the world. If the friendship remains despite you guys are in a relationship and if your partners can understand your friendship, it will be a great victory.
Very few movies have been able to successfully depict the friendship between a man and a woman without sensual connotation. I just came out of Ek Main Aur Ek Tu (EMAET) today and I have a feeling that to a certain extent, it was able to depict friendship between a man and a woman. But, only partially.


2 comments:

SEPO said...

Relation between a girl and a boy is really complex in nature! feeling from either side can at any point of time, seriously mess up the things between them!

Vishal Bheeroo said...

Indeed it is complex. What buggers me is the hypocrisy of society on the relationship between a man and a women as if only one relationship defines them..F***