2017-04-19

Friends after Break-Up


Relationships are made in heaven. It's an often read phrase that goes over the top and time for us to burst this over glamourized myth when suddenly everything burst like an inflated balloon. You've been in a relationship for long when suddenly you realize that both of you are not compatible. It's the time for break up, whether it's a marriage or dating. The big question is: Can you be friends after a break-up? It's not as easy as it seems and there is a whole range of complications that prevent us for painting an ideal picture about couples staying in touch. But, it's also true that in new age relationships, couples can stay in touch and maintain a healthy equation.

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Image credit: Google.

Leave on a good note 

There are many relationships in which couples leave on a sour note. It's the biggest mistake that they make. It shouldn't be awkward next time that both of you, who have moved on with different partners, happen to cross each other path. You shouldn't be nursing wounds and pent up and frustrating feeling building up inside your heart. If needed, talk it out before calling quits and leave in a positive manner. That way, it will make it healthy for your future relationships and just drop a cheerful hi to each other next time you meet.

Be respectful to each other

I strongly believe that no matter how ahead you've moved away from each other, it's important to honor a relationship that was and returning personal gifts shows a lack of respect to what existed between exes. Even in a moment of fury, keep your calm and never get personal by trading insults with each other. It will signal the death of the wonderful and positive moments spent together while at the same it will make it unhealthy to maintain peace or stay in touch, for that matter.

Never shift blame
If you are no longer with each other, do not assume that you can get away by shifting blame to the other person when both of you have moved on. Never say that he or she was fully at fault. It takes two hands to clap. Always remember that. The moment you shift blame, it will reduce to zero the chance of keeping in touch with other.

Be a mature person 

Never back bite the person you were in a relationship with and don't ever let a third party do that for they know very less of this relationship. It's disrespectful and shows a lack of respect of what lied between the both of you. Have a frank conversation with the person that meant the world to you and tell how much he or she will always carve a place in your heart and memories will be carried to your grave. Kiss her on the forehead for the last time not without telling that you would like to keep in touch. I'd say that as you part ways, tell him or her to inform of all the good news, be it exam results, marriage so that you may congratulate or even lows, feel free to share. That way, the person knows that you will always be here. Isn't it healthy and beautiful? Who knows with time, you can share a cup of coffee together and laugh over things.

Heal yourself

Break up can be painful. Pent up emotions can worsen things. Before parting, vent out and unload the burden in your heart for it's an opportunity to clear misunderstanding. Speak and vent out but listen and let the other person speak in a calm and composed tone. Cry if you may but heal yourself completely for who knows you may not see her smile for you or jokes making you laugh. You will no longer be able to fight and make up. Hug each other tightly and heal your soul.

Divorced, lived-in couples and children

You shared a life together under the same roof, be it as a lived-in-partner or a married couple with or without children. It gets very tricky when you have children and this is where you must use your charm in keeping the good relationship or understanding alive if you want to remain friends. There might be kids date with parents if you choose to be together during such meetings and make sure that you don't let anything negative filter during such moments. Always be respectful to each other. Of course, divorce proceedings often take a long time and when you meet in court, do drop a hi to each other even if you chose to maintain a distance. I have a friend who parted ways with her husband on a positive note and she told me that he is a wonderful man who will always be family for he is the father of her daughter. I think such a maturity is needed if you are a divorced couple and there is a need to shed ego or baggage for that matter. Every relationship is beautiful and the ones which are non-existent, can be designed like an art form.

Love
Vishal






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