2014-05-13

Ab Ke Baar 'Happy wale budday girl' Sunny Leone

The campaign trailer screeched to a dead end, Election Express will soon be a thing of the past and a blurry image. Political Pundits are busy indulging in crunching numbers as we anxiously anticipate the outcome of the Lok Sabha election. PM Manmohan Singh bids farewell and we dream of the magic of NaMo NaMo bringing an end to our woes, corruption, poverty, unemployment, terror attacks and restoring world peace.
What NaMo will do and won't do? The media is already tired as we are exposed to bits and pieces of the electoral campaign after putting Varanasi on the tourism card. The trolls will be a thing of the past. See! The media overexposed us to politics like junk food, growing our belly by leaps and bounds as we bated for breath. Bas Kijiye!
In our frenzy to catch the latest quick bite, we have forgotten bout' the one that hold our pulses in her hand. How can we forget her? Shez all about entertainment, entertainment and entertainment. Remember, she soared our temperature with her cleavage, prized assets to boost media TRP. Besharam and Namak Halal, Media. For God sake! It's Sunny Leone's birthday. How can we forget our dear Sunny in the frenzy for Lok Sabha Polls! Exit Polls! BJP victory, Congress drubbing, SEM soaring to escalating high. How dare we forget bout' the face that sells papers like Pakodas and TV run time. Sniff! No one remembers Sunny Leone now! Tauba Tauba!
Is the media and NaMo gonna tells us that today, Sunny's birthday will lead to her downfall coz of the Lok Sabha poll? Don't tell me NaMo will appoint Sunny Leone as Gujarat Chief Minister to boost tourism? Gujarat mein hum dum kyon ki banegi CM Sunny Leone.

Yeh Duniya Pital Di! Pital Di! Our girl turns 33 today and yet we try to obliterate the face of entertainment. Nobody thinking about our angel Sunny. Is it coz her stock is on the downfall since Ragini MMS? Stupid me! I thought media will celebrate her birthday to boost TRP. Are! Sharam Karo! Now, you don't need our Sunny now coz of Namo, doing an item number? Don't worry, Sunny. NaMo can never compete with you even if he removes his trendy Kurta and dance to Pital Di or Laila in his white Banyan stitched in Gujarat. Sunny Leone! Nobody can beat your item numbers and trust me, when the Lok Sabha and NaMo frenzy die, our media and netas hungry for lust will feed you with hot Dhokla made in Gujarat!
Who can dare forget you, Sunny? After all, MTV Splitsvilla is here and you will up the heat quotient and send the temperature soaring? Whoz NaMo? Certainly, NaMo or RaGa falls nowhere in your league. Penthouse girl!! They forgot you and so wanted to send you flowers, choco, cards and love but can't afford you like the uber charming princes of the super richie rich estate. I am happy you tweeted, flattered by all B-day Love, trending, crazy..xoxo.
Now, what I call beating NaMo's 56 inches chest, Lok Sabha and media at their own girl. See! Girl you are winner and not whiner, like our politicians. Anybody, beat that, the Sunny way. Who can dare to beat the Pent House gal? Yet, they forget you and worry not, they'll come back to you. Hows bout the idea of accepting the offer for Lok Sabha Speaker?! Crazy idea! See! I'm your shubbh chintak, at least, I can never forget your budday, girl.
Happy budday, Sunny Leone. Who cares about NaMo or RaGa. Ab ke Baar Sunny Leone.

Mere Paas Maa Hai

No power on earth can beat, Nirupa Roy, as the epic and classic Maa in movies, Mera Paas Maa Hai, not even, Mere Karan Arjun, aayega on Mother's Day. Maa Diwas on May 11, gave me a complex. The temptation was too much to give in it. See! I deserve a pat on the back for not uploading a picture of Me and Maa together! The whole internet razzia uploaded pics with Maa and super duper 100 crores snaps were all over the place, on Facebook, yelling, 'Mere Paas Maa Hai.'
Sultified! I was! C'mon! At least, I should have dig deep into the albums and retrieve the pics of Me and Maa together for the claim to fame and spruce up my stock as a loyal beta. I wished Maa on midnight, Happy Mother's Day' as the house Queen nodded with Okay. I feel stupid. After all, I have only printed images of us together, happy family putting a smile.
I choose to ride the less traveled road. I am a bored, no! I take resolution on Maa Diwas and to cut a long story short, I prefer to give Maa the respect throughout the year and no just on Maa Diwas. It's not that I claim that I don't shout on the roof top telling Maa, how much I love you. Like all Mango social media wanna be maverick, I posted Happy Mother's Day on Facebook and Tweeted in 140 words.
Our Moms are not Nirupa Roy but they deserve the respect, at least. Telling them, how much they sacrificed their lives for us, carried minnows us in their womb for nine months and whipped the naughty us so that we can shower love and affection on them for making us responsible, would be an aberration, right! I don't wanna get an earful, 'This is how you paying back by reducing to nought our love.' Come on, Moms hate to hear the sob stories of sons coz its in their nature to love us the way we are and no matter how much we grow, we shall remain their babies.
Cool Moms, super Moms and angry Mom! Let's be cool and give them the respect they deserve. I know, we cannot beat them in the love department and it's not that what they do is always right, let's be tolerant-cum-accepting, let our Moms be the people they always wanted to be. For long, they stuck to rules in society's definition of how Moms should be. Just let them be!
Hey, did you ask Mom's permissions before uploading the pic on Facebook? No! Nah! Let them be who they are for their own sake and for the act of loving them. No, we don't need to touch their feet to show them love but respect, baby. Who is saying that we shouldn't tell the world how much we love Mom and make them smile on Maa Diwas? Of course, we should but let's treat them with respect even if we feel they are a bit unreasonable. See! Mom's heart are like that only and they know na reason, they gotta tell us not to be bad boys and girls.
Mother India! Bharat Mata! Dharti Maa! They are the Moms of Moms, u see! Social media, netas and patriots that we are, invoke them like anything during this Lok Sabha Polls. It's like upping the emotional quotient to grab more votes by tickling our patriotic, oops, emotional self..Maa in the times of politics and religion. What they don't do to make us feel small if we don't comply with their definition of politicking. Maa! Tujhe Salaam! Desh ke naam Pe! They shall take the name of Dharti Maa to split us in caste, race and regions to culminate their brand politics.
They use the name of Maa to tell us ki Ab ki Baar, he has come and in the name of Maa, we shall vote for him and usher for change...after all! Maa Ganga ne bulaya! Our bad days are over, he will make us crorepati, he is the new Mr Apple, he will bring Steve Jobs back from heaven, the 'aam aadmi' bad days are over, diamonds will be cheaper than water. In the name of Maa, he is the messiah that will save us and is equipped with gauntlet to save us from bad guys, inflation, terrorism, global melt down.
India deserves better! Bharat Mata deserves better and our Moms deserve better. Let's not abuse her and let not dilute our love for her.
Happy Mother's Day to mother's of the world.
Jai Hind
With Love to Maa
V

2014-05-04

Letter to Surya: WoW-feeling hot-hot-hot


Dear Mr Surya
Some call you Devta (God),
for the rest you are the sun that shines and, at times, become unbearable;
It's the election season as we are made to stay in the queue to vote as our friends are lamenting on your power;
Our friends, the journalists, who bring us the crisp news and tread where few dare to face your brunt;
You become unbearable for all of us and this season you are too hot to handle;
Did I say Hot?
Surya you are so hot that the female hotties in Mumbai run away from you to sit cold colas and coffees in Phoren and cold countries;
IIFA is just a pretext for them to sweat it out on stage to avert your gaze coz you get sadistic pleasure in burning their skins;
We, the commoners, can't bear your fury as we hunt for cold and icy water filled in bottles;
Please have some mercy on us this season;
We know that no one can match your power on earth as you zoom on us with utmost ease and we cannot hide from you;
Where shall we escape?
Journos that we are have to bear your anger as we cover the Lok Sabha election, running from pillar to post, as we secret wish for mercy in such dangerous times;
We celebrated the World Press Freedom yesterday as an ode to daring journalist,
but can the gentle you shield us from the angry you,
O' Surya!
We need freedom from you,
though, in another time, we will long for your cover
coz we know the vitamin that we so abhor comes from you,
you pump us with energy in form of Sun;
How complex our relations are!
Be gentle for a while;

The poem is written as part of Write Over the Weekend theme for this week:
The heat this summer is unbearable. Here’s your chance to write a witty letter to the Sun God/Goddess convincing him/her to go a little easy on us.
It is also linked to World Press Freedom celebrated on May 3 for journalist across the globe.

Include this code:
This post is a part of Write Over the Weekend, an initiative for Indian Bloggers by BlogAdda.
Every weekend, we give out a creative writing prompt to rekindle the love of writing in all you creative writers.
Follow link on: http://blog.blogadda.com/2014/05/02/wow-feeling-hot-hot-hot-creative-writing-prompt-weekend-indian-bloggers