Is WhatsApp or social media defining new age relatonships?

Online space is defining and reinventing the way we love, connect on a deeper level and giving an altogether different meaning to friendships. As cliché as it may sound, Hare ek friend zaroori hota hai! A date could be set on Facebook or to a lesser extent on Twitter but have you thought about meeting on WhatsApp! I feel it’s safer to connect on phone. 

Nothing new about it. Of course, during the older days-I already feel like a monument-we flirted through SMS what with the Extra talk time package or free messaging-getting to know each other or meeting up. Love in the time of WhatsApp is the real deal. I’d still go for a relation carrying no burden or guilt.

Friendships carved without meeting someone face-to-face and the blogging connection cemented our bonds, taking it further on WhatsApp. A random encounter with a girl on Facebook and we added each other on WhatsApp, with harmless flirting, calls and voice recording. Yet, nothing happened for we realized we had nothing in common after some point. The fact that we are based in different countries didn’t really help us and we called it quits.

The WhatsApp romance is quite tricky and complex, making me wonder whether we can take things ahead. Quite a tough nut to crack and though, there is no denying the fact, people actually dated through this blind encounter. I just made a new friend on Whatsapp. Don’t get colorful ideas. It’s just platonic friendship and sharing things with each other for there is no scope for something serious. She has her life and I have my mine. Friendship and romance are two different coins, pretty much like western and central railways that never converge. We can make awesome friends that bear no place for a relationship. It’s about being each other’s support system and always good to connect with souls having similar interests, unlike the classic Facebook tagline.

We need friends or people to nurture an emotional quotient. One good thing about social media friendship and growing closeness with no strings attached-I don’t mean it in an intimate way-is that it brings us back to the distant past of college friends and creating memories, to add happiness and spice to break away from the monotony of a stressful life.

The countless forwards, funny memes and videos shared with hundreds of connections seem mechanic at times. Some like it. The rest will just ignore them. A fleeting chance that one of your connections will take the opportunity to strike a conversion and bang, this moment dawned that you can really connect and have so much to share beyond repetitive images. A chance encounter to take things ahead may be meeting for coffee or movie date. Classic tale, right.

Romance or plain friendships, Whatsapp is reinventing the way we see our relationships with folks or getting to know new people. Granted, social media has killed old age friendship or romance of meeting someone in a public space but getting to know each other through the smartphone is a deal. Quite an open question on how the digital world is altering our equations.  Can it lead to a stronger bond or something substantial remains a big interrogation mark?

 

Flash fiction: Missing wallet and a smooch

The Darkroom:

The room was eerily dark. Ghostly shadow gallivanted behind the curtain with a frenetic pace, to and fro, scaring the shit out of her as the face was in the pillow. Hallucination, the voice roared in her ear. She cursed herself for checking in the hotel room near the forest. The voices didn't stop at anything to harass her. "When the fuck is the light going to come back," she cursed. Footsteps scampered behind the door and she almost yelped out of fear, invoking prayers to save her from the jaws of death. Thud! Someone banged the door. She was too shaken to face the room's entrance and almost jettisoned out of the bed. "Ma'am," a voice spoke, "You checked in the wrong room. It's the dark room. Hope you are not too scared."

Whatsapp!

 "Throw away your smartphone. Whatsapp just doesn't work."

"You lost it. Why don't you give me your super expensive phone, snob woman."

"No, I am tired of it man. Every time, you send bulk and silly whatsapp forward?"

"So, I am the one who suffers na."

"Just throw it away, will you? Or get a new one...check your settings."

"Can't. It keeps me on the toes to fight the imagined ghosts."

"Your head...your head....biggest distraction."

"What?"

"There is no point flooding my whatsapp and waking me up in the night to send you back the same old pictures 1000 times."

"You don't need to. My whatsapp has stopped functioning."

"Good! I blocked you."

The missing wallet


Dan searched everywhere for his wallet and threw away all the documents scattered on the table. The orange wallet has mysteriously disappeared and he has less than one hour to settle payments. He pulled off the curtain and flung the bed sheet in frustration. The phone buzzed and the call center agent chirpily said, "Thank you, Mr. Dan. Your account has been debited." Dan was crestfallen and wondered whether the wallet and the credit card walked on its own. He was disjointed and slouched on the chair. A sharp object hurt his asset which propelled him to sprang to his feet. The wallet was smiling at him, napping on the sofa. He flapped it open and saw the bank cards wreathed inside, unharmed. "Who made the payment," he wondered.

A smooch

Niharika excitedly scampered in the crowded mall and hugged him tightly. She gently cupped her face towards his mouth to smooch passionately. He was shaken and stirred at the same time. She sensed the confusion on his face and moved two steps backward. "Ron!" she asked. A wry smile surfaced and he nodded victoriously. He got his revenge on her when she rejected his proposal in college to go steady with his twin brother.  She seethed with rage and her face went pale.

Things I did this week!

 I ain't-a dull boy. Entertainment and a zing for life happen when I least ask for them or take steps. I am Usain Bolt in reverse, except that running for my life as if a pack of wolves are unleashed on me. This writer-should I call me one?- is plainly bored with existence and fishing for stuff like the KFC burger that got deleted out of life.

1. No fat cat

I ain't-a cat snuggling on my mistress' bed. Ever heard of a balloon popping inside my body system? Battling the nerves like a mad car running out of the steam, the cholesterol result reveals an increasing spree pretty much like the shades of grey and creamy stuff. A tale of needle pricking the thumb. Bad signal. I felt like Bahubali in the middle of the night when doctar babu had to press the thumb for the juices to flow. I could have licked my own blood. A sixer! I could have been Edward Cullen without my Bell at Twilight. Time to cut the slack or trouble like in the Big Boss House. Sniff! Sniff! I am not Garfield.

2. Run Vishal Run

I am not a burglar nor I have abandoned a war zone post. I broke a record this week by going for jogging thrice a week, a first from the usual two trips. I braved the rain and got drenched. What we have to do for health! This world, I tell you. Next times, I shall break free like a bovine afflicted by madness or chase people like a famished dog.

3. Whatsapp!

Whatsapping and sharing silly forwards feel like a ritual for me that changes hands like hide-and-seek in childhood. Head you win, tail I lose! You know illusion are objects closer in the mirror than they appear. The nostalgia of train travel in childhood and images of moving train, berth list, huddling compartments, and weight machine in cartoon description brought me back to those days. I saved the images to send to some 50 to 70 odd contacts on the phone. A haha was sent back on this human creation called WhatsApp but suddenly it seems that the ghost was angry. It felt like Baba Ramdev's curse for mocking Patanjali.  My whatsapp wasn't opening and after fiddling with it, between switching on and off, it felt like angry birds died suddenly. Finally, all was good like happy ending in our movies.

4. Bacha party

The little monster in the neighborhood turned two today and I was feeling like a zombie saying No the mouth-watering fries on the table. Sweets and cakes are like the sexy girl that I cannot resist which broke my resilience. I munched on them along with tea. Indulgence looks like 'Maya' sauntering into my life and the ugly uncle mouthing on the bacha's cake. The only thing missing was a devil and decayed tooth to scare the brave child who was too busy with his cake and candle.

5. Oatmill kid

You know the Complan kid who suddenly grows taller. I am the Oatmill kid who wakes up and sleeps with it as if it's Cinderella. Oh! Cholesterol! Now, Oatmill is my lethal weapon of mass destruction to destroy cholesterol every single day. Now, who stole my grains! But, then why do I feel like Saddam and not George Bush?!

Blind Date: What To and not To Do!

You've been spending hours and sleepless nights chatting on Facebook and whatsapping naughty jokes, sharing sweet nothings and romantic notes.  The time is ripe to see each other in flesh. I've been on a couple of blind dates in the past during my 20s and most of the time, nothing came out of it with Hi and Bye while the last time, A gifted me a Steve Martini book and a kiss, of course, on the cheek. What to do and not to do on a blind date.

Image credit: Google

1. Time and place to meet, Your's or Mine

A was very obstinate and told me in no equal terms that she is the one who will decide when and where we will meet. The decision was her's and I only insisted that we need to meet before I move to Pune. The trick lies in making sure about the identity of the person and to ensure that you are not speaking to a perv or someone playing tricks on you. We were speaking on phone at a time where there was no FB or Whatsapp, shedding pocket money on chota recharge.

Always make sure that you meet in a place filled with people so that you are not stranded or the person acts smart with you. Honestly, I was a bit tense and can't remember what I wore, though we agreed on what and how we will look like. She had short hair and was dressed in a Kurti on denim. We entered a restaurant for Cola-the time I was drinking the beverage-and made a quick exit in her car. We kissed in the car, on her cheek, you naughties.

2.  Dress well but don't over do

I always believe that it's important to dress in what one is comfy for the first or blind date. You don't need to be jazzy or going over the top to kill. Over dressing can be an absolute no no and may scare off the other person. Keep in mind that both of you are strangers and not friends who would tolerate each other's garish clothes. It's a major put off to see someone be dressed over the top and lacking basic fashion sense. For guys or gals, simplicity works. I always believe in putting a nice tee or shirt on the denim, not those tight jeans that you would not able to sit or move your assets.

3. Keep the conversation simple

It's the first step and don't step on his or her toe on the first date itself. Being over friendly on a blind date and acting over smart to know everything, be it, first boy friend, ex-es, family and friends and sex life can make people run away from you. You will sound like a despo. It's very important not to monopolize the conversation and let the person speak as well. Keep the date short because at some point, both of you may go into silent mode and not knowing what to say.

4. Take time to be comfortable

Don't be stressed and take few minutes to settle yourself, between ordering coffee and striking the conversation. Sometimes, simple things like comment on the weather or city life may help to break the ice. Since, it's a first date, both of you may feel a bit out of place and stressed out. Just chill and be yourself, before you start speaking. You are not meeting after registering profiles on shaadi.com or some match making that you need to get hitched. Take your own time and if it works, build the relationship over time.

5. Avoid intimate, over touching gestures

It's a blind date and you can greet each other with a firm handshake, a kiss or a hug but avoid holding the person tight. It may also cause uneasiness if you constantly touch your date with hands or shoulders. It's an absolute No to go for smooch or getting intimate during the first date for it will spell doom and a recipe for disaster. Trust me, it might kill a relationship that has the chance of having a long leash of life and will, ultimately, turn out in it being a very casual affair or both of you end up being fuck buddies.

6. Recognizing each other 

It's quite easy to recognize each other when both of you are meeting for the first time. While, it is normal to describe what each other will wear and descriptions such as hair style or  height, what will happen if there is another person with the same set of description. The trick lies in one of you coming early and sitting in a particular place in a crowded cafe and whatsapping where you are sitting or standing. Always stand up, call the name before greeting the person.

7. Place to catch up

The best place to meet your blind date is in a cafe or open space where there is no hazard or being exposed to unpleasant surprises. Never ever make the mistake of going for a movie together or some crazy folks planning to meet in a hotel room. It can be very dangerous with people pretending to be someone else, hiding behind Facebook or a phone. Always be safe and enjoy the game of flirting and, of course, don't over do it.

A blind date is an amazing game of dating and catching up, sharing if both of you can hit it off. Have fun but at the same time, enjoy the blind date and trust me, it's damn fun.

Love

Vishal